


Show Me Where My Skin Begins

by Occhiolysm



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types
Genre: Canon: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, Gen, Post-Canon, Recovery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-05
Updated: 2016-04-05
Packaged: 2018-05-31 11:51:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6469087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Occhiolysm/pseuds/Occhiolysm
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The dust is settling, and Al is human again.  And that's just a tiny bit overwhelming…</p><p>[Major Spoilers for Brotherhood]</p>
            </blockquote>





	Show Me Where My Skin Begins

**Author's Note:**

> A little one-shot born of an FMAB rewatch, chronicling the first few hours after Al returns to his body.
> 
> Title from "Atlas: Touch" by Sleeping At Last which may be the most perfect song for Al ever.
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

Al's knees were wobbling, and he was hungry.

And those were kind of the only two things he could process right now.The violent assault on his senses was overwhelming, and he found himself trying to block out the _muchness_ that surrounded him inside and out.Ed was supporting him with a firm, gentle arm around his shoulders as they said goodbye to Ling and May.He could feel the warmth of Ed's body through the black coat draped over him.The coat rubbed like sandpaper against his back, his shoulder blades, his arms.His eyelids slid wetly over glossy, sore eyes.His hands trembled where they gripped the coat, barely capable of even that exertion.His hair tickled the back of his neck and his forehead.His stomach was soft, and he thought he could feel his organs squishing.The ground was rough, and the soles of his feet protested every sharp angle and every new texture.If Al could be reliably trusted to remember what his skin even felt like before, he felt like sure that this was the equivalent of having the first three layers of epidermis ripped off, leaving a pink, naked wreck.And his knees were wobbling.

For four years all he had wanted was to get his body back, and now he had it, but he couldn't deny that it hurt.

"Alphonse," said Ed delicately, inclining his head toward Al's and speaking very softly."Are you okay?You're quiet."

Al smiled."I'm fine, brother."The words crawled their way out of his throat, which was somehow sore and ticklish at once."Just thinking."

"Okay.Well," he said, wrapping his other arm around Al as well, settling his new flesh fingers in Al's hair, and craning his neck to look around them.Recovery staff were hard at work, medics treating injured and carrying them away in stretchers.There was no one they knew in sight."I guess we should get you to the hospital, right?"

Al was reasonably certain that Ed had never spoken this gently in his life.

"You too, brother," Al said."Your arm is bleeding awfully."

"I know," said Ed, shifting the arm behind Al."Hurts like a bitch, too.And I'm starving.Let's find food."

Al's stomach felt like a _chasm_."Fine with me," he laughed.

Then, from behind them, in a voice wrought with quivering emotion and melodrama, " _Oh_ , Elric brothers!"The boys turned to find Major Armstrong—sans shirt—clenching his fists in passion."You shall never fathom my heart's delight at seeing you alive and whole once more!How can we ever begin to repay you for what you have done this day?"  


Ed didn't look like he was even going to try to think of a way to respond, so Al said, "Oh, thank you, Major.But there's no need to say that—we don't want anything in return."

But pounding in Al's ears were invasive thoughts of _besides, we caused this carnage._ And _if it weren't for us, this destruction wouldn't have happened.It's our fault for bringing this down on all of Central.People lost their lives, and it's because of us._

But he knew those weren't true.He had to know.And it wasn't the sort of thing he was going to say to Major Armstrong, either.Suddenly it became a very monumental task to hold back tears.A task he was unpracticed in the art of.

Armstrong was talking again."May I at least, then, do you the honor of escorting you to the hospital?It would be my genuine honor!"

"Sure, that'd actually be great," Ed said, scratching the back of his head.

Al was just wondering how he was possibly going to make it that far on these useless, wobbly knees when Armstrong said, "Would it be helpful to you, young Alphonse, if I were to carry you there, in light of your condition?"

Al's first instinct was to give an immediate, resounding _No_ just because of how undignified it would look.But it _was_ tempting.He turned to Ed.

"Well, Al, it's a pretty long way there…"

"I think that would be good, Major Armstrong.Thank you."

It _was_ undignified, but Al was glad he did it.He couldn't wait for the day when he didn't have to lean on anyone, and these legs he'd hoped and prayed for for so long could finally do their job.For now, he'd have to take the help.He wasn't _Ed_ ; he wasn't ashamed to accept help when he needed it.

Armstrong helped them check into the hospital, and they were brought to a clean room with two neat beds, similar to the ones Ed had frequented in this very hospital over the years.It was very lucky that the hospital hadn't been among the carnage of the day's ordeal.Al didn't think he ever would have been able to forgive himself.

Nurses were present right away to take care of them.Ed needed more immediate care than he did, of course.There was no bone damage on his left upper arm where the screw had impaled it, but it had done damage to the bicep, which could be treated now but would still take a while to heal.Ed got stitches and a lot of bandages, and he still looked a wreck.

It almost bothered Al that he didn't.In fact, there was very little the nurses could do for him at this moment.His would be a much slower recovery over months and months of therapy.It wasn't exactly something to look forward to.But he didn't wear his battle scars.Not like Ed did.His skin was clean.Fresh, like a baby's.The shell that bore his scars was out there, crumbling in the dirt.Maybe it had been moved already.Maybe they were just going to clear it out with the rubble.

And Al discovered that this topic was definitely, definitely not something he could let himself think about right now.

Major Armstrong stayed in the room until after Ed's first aid was done.

"I bid you farewell, Elric brothers, and I earnestly hope for your speedy recovery," he said, saluting them.

"Thank you, Major," said Al.

Just before Armstrong made it out the door, Ed spoke up from the bed to the right of Al."Uh, Major?"

"Yes, Edward Elric?"

"Um, how's, y'know, the Colonel doing?"

Al turned to see concern to knit into Ed's face.Ed usually tried to veil any affection toward the Colonel with sarcasm and a lot of shouting—although Al, of course, knew better—but now it seemed that Ed was either too tired or too worried to care.

Armstrong hesitated."He…is here in the hospital, I believe.He is…healthy."

Al took that to mean _"He'll be okay, but yes, he's still blind, and his life may never be the same again."_

Ed gave Armstrong a little nod, effectively dismissing him.

The nurses left a short time later—they must have been very busy, of course—telling them that they had full use of the bathroom in the room, if they wanted to wash up, and promising to send food within the half hour.

"Do you want to take a shower, brother?" Al said when they were alone.

Ed smiled at him."You first."

Al hadn't even _thought_ about showers.It was instinct, at this point, to usher Ed towards personal hygiene without needing to consider it himself.His heart swelled, and his eyes lit up, and he nodded.

Ed helped him into the bathroom, made sure he had soap, a rag, shampoo, and a towel, got the water running warm but not hot, and helped him in, trying not to get wet.

Al tiptoed tentatively into the spray of water, one inch of skin at a time, holding onto the bar for support."A-a little cooler, brother."

Ed stuck his hand through the curtain and adjusted the handle a bit, and the slight sting eased from the water.

The feel of the water pelting his legs and arms was foreign rather than comfortable.But Al figured that he had to get clean sometime, so it was pointless to be nervous about it.He ducked into the stream in one step, and shuddered as the water ran over his head and into his hair.It took a few seconds to get used to, but once he did, it was…god, it was _glorious_.

"Oh. My. God," he said, as the warmth spread all over him and massaged his scalp and shoulders and back, and… "Oh my _god_ , brother."

Ed laughed at him from the other side of the shower curtain.

He spent nearly a half hour in the shower.Part of that was savoring the feeling of gradually warming the water and letting it wash away stress and sorrow and numbness.Part of that was being frustrated at how difficult it was to simply wash himself.Ed ended up having to wash his hair when his arms got tired, and the feeling of fingers kneading into his scalp was heavenly.

"I've never had long hair before," he said as Ed worked the lather down to the ends.

"Huh.Yeah.That's right.Well, not every day someone suddenly gets long hair, yeah?"   


"Yeah," Al laughed.

When he got out of the shower, Ed wrapped him in a fuzzy towel—well, it was pretty thin compared to most towels probably, but it felt fuzzy to Al, and also a little scratchy—and guided him back to the bed.

"Aw man, where the fuck's our food?The service here sucks.No tip for them, I'm getting room service."

"You should take a shower before it gets here.You look super gross."

"Good to know I can always count on you to make me feel better," Ed mumbled, but he did make his way to the bathroom.

Five minutes later, he emerged with a thin pair of hospital pants and a towel around his shoulders, his hair dripping onto the linoleum."You think they've got a hairbrush somewhere?"

Al shrugged.Propped up comfortably in a bed, drowsiness was starting to kick in.The novelty of that!Drowsiness!

Ed wandered off in search of a hairbrush, returning a few minutes later successful in his search and working a brush through his golden tangles.

He had just finished with his own hair and passed the hairbrush to Al when the food arrived.And it arrived via the welcome vessel of Second Lieutenant Maria Ross.

"Ross!" Ed exclaimed when she walked through the door."You're here!With food!I love you!"

But Ross wasn't even looking at him.She was looking at Al, tears gathering at the very corners of her eyes."Alphonse, it's you."  


And here he went again, trying to choke back a painful lump in his throat and not let it show on his face.This had kind of a been a rollercoaster of a day."It's—good to see you," Al managed.

She crossed the room, setting the bags of food—the extremely enticingly scented bags of food—at the end of his bed and leaning forward to hug him carefully, but warmly.

_Hugs_.Al had known he missed them, but he hadn't remembered how they felt.He wanted a thousand hugs to make up for missing out for so long.They were warm and soft and he felt safe.

"It's good to see you too, Al," she said when she released him from the hug, her voice a bit damp with emotion but her smile bright.

"How come you're in Central?" said Ed."I didn't know you were here, I thought you were still in Xing."

She gave a brief recounting of a journey across Xing, a drive in an ice cream truck stocked with weapons, and an interesting adventure in a radio studio.Al felt bad to admit that he was drifting in and out of her story, because…that bag of food.It _smelled_.

Whether Ross noticed his longing or not, she wrapped up quickly by saying, "I can tell you another time, and you'll hear it all from different people.I'll leave you boys to eat—it's not much, restaurants are oddly not inclined to continue service during the apocalypse.I'm sure you're tired.We can catch up later.I'm glad you're safe."  


They said their farewells to her, and as soon as she was out the door Ed pounced on the bag of food.He scavenged through it, pulling out the items that interested him."Mm, sausages, some toast, a…block of cheese, okay, and—what's this?Turkey sandwich?Ooh, it's hot.Here, Al, eat this."Ed handed him the warm sandwich, and Al's mouth positively watered.It looked like it had turkey, melted cheese, tomatoes, and…well, that's all he took note of before leaning in for a huge bite.

Needless to say, it was a revelation on par with passing through the Gate, and a lot cheaper.He wolfed the entire thing down as fast as he could, savoring every detail—the drippy tomatoes, the crunch of the lettuce, the soft bread, the tangy turkey, the warm cheese—it was the best thing he had _ever_ eaten, he was sure of it.

Ed was working through his own sandwich, and when they both finished they started on the sausages.

It was halfway through the sausages that Al started to feel overwhelmed again.Here he was, sitting on a bed with Ed, in his real body, feeling the brush of the blankets and the sink of the pillows and the warmth of food in his mouth and in his belly…he was real.He was human.He was a _human_ again, finally.

This time, when the tears sprang to eyes, he couldn't stop them in time.It was painful, trying to keep them back, but they leaked out anyway, and he brushed them away with sniffles.Ed had stopped eating entirely, looking up at him with concern."Al?"

"I'm sorry," Al said, his voice distorted from emotion."I don't know why I'm crying."

Ed crawled up next to him and wrapped both arms around him.Al pressed into his touch, unable to stop the tears now that they had come.So _much_ was happening. 

"Shh, shh, it's okay," said Ed."It's okay, Al."He stroked his damp hair softly.

Al sniffled and pressed a hand to his eye."I'm just so overwhelmed, brother," he choked out.

"I know.I know, it's okay."

"I'm so happy, I can't believe it's real."

"I've got you," Ed soothed.

"Please don't go anywhere," Al managed quietly.It was probably pathetic to ask, but he didn't care."Just for a little while."

"I'm not going anywhere," Ed said."I'm not going to let anything happen to you, ever, Al."  


"I love you so much, brother.Thank you."No matter how he tried, Al couldn't seem to stop crying.

"I love you too, Al.Now shh, it's okay."

Ed petted his hair gently, and Al nuzzled into his shoulder and let Ed's arms wrap around him. _This_ was what he missed.He missed this more than sausages and tomatoes, more than wind and ticklish things and showers. _This_ was humanity.Huddling close to the people you loved and letting your touches speak when your words couldn't.He had missed his brother, and it felt like he was just waking up from a long nightmare to find that the sun was shining through the window and it was all going to be okay.Mom was gone, but Ed was here.


End file.
